Minsk to Mist

That is the question I’ve been hearing a lot from both my compatriots in Belarus and my new compatriots in London, especially after they learn that I used to ‘have it all’ back where I was born.

At the age of 26, I was working for a major IT firm in Minsk, had my own flat (without any mortgages, etc.), two cars (one for myself, one for my partner at the time), decent salary, lots of visas that enabled me to travel the world, etc. And a few years later, at the age of 29, I uprooted my life and moved across Europe to start anew.

So yeah, what made me do that?

There were a few reasons for that:

• I simply wanted to live in London.

Prior to my relocation, I visited London quite frequently on business. And at some point, I realised that I got into a ‘London state of mind’ (hope Billy Joel forgives me for misquoting his song). My life consisted of three states – ‘I’m about to go to London’, ‘I’m in London!’ or ‘I’m looking forward to my next trip to London’. It felt like dating someone you really love without making any commitments to each other. So, it was time to move. Or to move in, to be more precise.

• ‘Having it all’ at a young age is actually a problem.

When I was 27, I fell deeply into a depression. I was struggling at work, didn’t have any hobbies, and was really unhappy with my more-than-decent life. By Belarusian standards, I was actually pretty well-off. After a few sessions, my therapist at the time reached to a conclusion that I was having… a mid-life crisis. (Apparently, you can have one prematurely).

The thought was hard to swallow at first, but with time, I started realising that I lost a sense of purpose. While you are in the process of achieving (and overachieving) financially, you think that, once you get your own property and don’t need to worry about money, you will be happy forever. Let me tell you now – it does NOT work that way. Always striving for something else is what keeps us alive. Mentally alive anyway.

Moving to a new place, especially as challenging as London is, sounded like a good starting point.

• I wanted to have better opportunities for the next generation of my family.

My partner at the time and I never had kids. We could afford them back in Belarus, but I just felt that I wasn’t ready to bring new life into the world until I was in my thirties. And that they should have better opportunities in life than I did.

Don’t get me wrong – I appreciate the good start that my parents gave to me despite all the trials and tribulations they had to go through shortly after the collapse of the Soviet Union. And even in Belarus you can still have a pretty decent life as long as you work hard and know the right people.

But I wanted (and still want) my future children to have even more than I could afford back home. I strive for them to have one of the strongest passports in the world (trust me, when you need to get a visa to go almost anywhere, it doesn’t make travelling that much fun), get European education, speak one of the most common languages in the world as their mother tongue. And if I’m lucky enough to ever have a daughter, I want her to avoid (at least mostly) everyday sexism that is still rampant in many former Soviet countries.

What made you move to another country? What sort of life did you have back home? Has your new life after the relocation met your expectations? Drop me a few lines in the comments!